It is the Christmas season, when carols ring out on every street and colorful lights decorate the city. However, as the festival atmosphere becomes stronger, there are many people who feel depressed in a corner of their hearts. This is the so-called ‘holiday blues.’
According to foreign media such as Medical Express on the 22nd (local time), as the Christmas season approaches, an increasing number of people are complaining of holiday depression.
A recent survey by the American Psychological Association (APA) found that 89% of American adults experienced stress during the Christmas holidays. The financial burden of preparing gifts, long-standing conflicts between family members, and longing for those who passed away were cited as the main causes.
Holiday depression refers to depression that occurs during the holiday period from Chuseok to New Year’s Day. Main symptoms include depression, loss of interest or pleasure in things you like, anxiety, and nervousness.
Laurie Kramer, professor of applied psychology at Northeastern University, said, “People often have an ideal of being ‘perfectly happy’ during the holidays, but in reality, it is virtually impossible to meet this every time.” The gap between expectations of having a happy year-end holiday season and reality leads to depression.
He explained, “The holidays act as a kind of milestone that makes us compare our current position in life with the past,” and “As happy memories of the past or traumas we experienced are contrasted with the current situation, it causes a sense of loss and stress.”
In particular, the glamorous daily lives of others seen through social media (SNS) deepen the sense of relative deprivation. The more unrealistic ideals we pursue, the bigger the gap with reality becomes.
Another big cause of holiday depression is ‘guilt.’ When you have family or friends by your side who are going through a difficult time, it can easily feel like a selfish act to have fun on your own. Feeling like I’m ruining the holiday spirit because of my depressed mood and the pressure of having to pretend to be happy when I’m depressed on the inside are also very stressful.
Also, for people who are experiencing a loss that is not readily apparent, such as a family caring for a dementia patient, or who are carrying deep and accumulated sadness, such as divorce or the death of a child, the statement, “You should have fun during the holidays” can actually come across as greater pressure and stress.
To overcome holiday blues, it’s important to readjust your expectations. Professor Kramer emphasized, “We need to let go of the fantasy of having a perfect vacation,” and “Instead of having a grand party or fancy decorations, focus on how you can end the day comfortably.”
If there is someone around you who is struggling with holiday depression, how can you help them? Professor Kramer says, “Rather than avoiding the situation, it is helpful to point it out clearly.” A simple word of empathy, such as “I know this is a psychologically difficult time for you,” can be an important opportunity for the other person to open up.
If you are feeling depressed, it is important to make a conscious effort to escape rather than following the urge to isolate yourself. This is because social support networks made up of family, friends, neighbors, etc., and interactions with other people are one of the most powerful defenses against stress.
Professor Kramer said, “The sense of isolation that makes you feel unhappy at a time when everyone seems happy makes depression worse,” and emphasized that it is especially important to spend time with others the more depressed you are.
